Princely Possibilities

I recently had the great pleasure of speaking with Corey Graham from the site Midnight Corey. It was intended to be an interview, but in the end it was more like a long chat with a really good friend I hadn't spoken with in ages. Corey was just so easy to talk to, and he not only made me feel comfortable but he was quite flattering and generous with his praise. I had a really good time. When he posts the links I will add them here so you folks can hear me ramble on and on and talk over the poor lad more than once.

Have melted face, will travel.

One thing we talked about, among a plethora of other stuff, was the movie Prince of Darkness. I watched it twice that day, once in the morning just after work and once again when I woke up that afternoon. Along the way I took notes, because there were things I wanted to touch on and these days I have the memory of a cheese sandwich. We discussed some of my notes, and Corey brought up tons of things I hadn't thought of with his own notes. Great minds think alike, eh?

I thought, just for grins and giggles, that I might post my notes here for you folks. Mind you, this is sort of stream of consciousness stuff. Random thoughts I done thunk while watching the movie. I hope you enjoy them.

****

Prince of Darkness is one of Carpenter’s less loved films. Folks either like it okay, or hate it, but few love it. Carpenter considers it part of an apocalyptic trilogy, started with The Thing and ending with In the Mouth of Madness. I love all three, though The Thing takes lead above the others.

The main problem with the movie is that it tries to explore evil in the terms of quantum physics, but loses something in the translation from highbrow clever to everyday audience member. In other words, it’s too smart for the average person. The second issue is the pacing. I love me some Carpenter but this film is slow! Unlike The Thing—where the action starts within the first few minutes of the film and doesn’t let up for the whole show—or Mouth of Madness—where the gore and creep factors take the reigns from the action—the pacing here is almost nonexistent. It spends most of its time talking and philosophizing. While I enjoy it, I can see where others would turn their collective noses up at it. I’ve willingly sat through recorded Joseph Campbell lectures. This was a piece of cake.

This is a zombie film at heart. Dead folks get up and walk around. Pure definition of zombie. (Anyone want to argue this point with me, feel free to email me. But I warn all takers, you will lose.)

Alice, you are my hero!

The women are given the lead as far as bad guys go. The women are scarier, and seem stronger. Then there is the actual antichrist him/herself. At first you think it’s a gestational thing, like she will give birth to the antichrist, then when she becomes the antichrist you have to wonder about it. Do all women have the devil inside? The answer is yes. Meanwhile, all of the men seem upset that they have to kill you. Like they really regret it. The women? Not so much. Evil bitches!

Prince of Darkness is full of ugly people. Either that or the 80s were full of ugly people.

Redheads love porn mustaches. And coffee leads to sex.

Alice Cooper amazes me with this movie, because he didn’t take a lead role and screw with it, or a walk on part where he waves and smiles and little else. No, he gets this minor role and acts the hell out of it. He is scary as fuck.

Problems I see so far:

1) not enough sex

2) not enough religion

3) not enough gore

Everyone in this movie stands around with their mouths open, hence they are more susceptible to having ancient evil squirted inside. Speaking of such things, does the whole possession by deadly fluids equate to a kind of pseudo-sexual imagery? Evil jacking off in your mouth, as it were. See? This is why most women don't like to swallow!

And here is the second reason most won't swallow.

Apparently becoming the daughter of Satan gives you leprosy. And telekinesis. The telekinesis I’ll take, without the skin damage please.

To a chastity belt, maybe?

Most of the actors deliver their lines in a sort of bland way. No one seems to care or want to be cared about. Save for Donald Pleasence. He really gets excited by the fact that the devil is taking earthly form. It upsets him so much, and he gives such an emotional performance that it almost makes up for the other cardboard characters. Almost.

Lovecraftian is a good word to describe this movie. It sounds odd but it is true.

This can't be good.

Three things I’ve learned from this movie:

1) Smart people are just as stupid as stupid people in horror movies.

2) A crucified pigeon is hobo sign for you are screwed.

3) Mirrors hold the devil, but I already knew that

Did Father Loomis just sit through Birack taking a nap? How creepy is that?

OMG! So many bugs! Why is no one in the movie as creeped out by the bugs like I am? They just shrug it off like it ain't nothing but a thing. Worms crawling up the window? Really? That dosen't make you stop and go, hrmm?

I think the whole future dream signals were lost on folks. The effect of it, I mean. It appears to have little to do with the movie save for the 'reveal' at the end. And even then we aren't sure what it was supposed to mean. Does Satan get out eventually? Or did the woman escape in the future?

*****

And that was pretty much it. Thanks for giving it a read. 

Later taters,

Tonia