A Word with Loren Rhoads

Loren Rhoads decided to brave my questions, then I promptly got distracted by this thing called life. Still, here we are, got there in the end and all. Wait... is this the end? I mean THE end? Surely not. I have so much left to do. I never got to ... 
Oh, my cats have assured me this isn't THE end. 
Phew! I was worried there for a moment. Geesh. I feel kind of silly now. You read her lovely responses while I go get my affairs in order for the real THE end. 

Who in the hell are you? What are you doing on my blog! Oh… that’s right, I invited you. *ahem* I meant to say, take a moment to introduce yourself.

Loren:  I’m the co-author, along with Brian Thomas, of a new succubus novel called As Above, So Below.  I’m also editor of The Haunted Mansion Project: Year Two and author of Wish You Were Here: Adventures in Cemetery Travel, which collects my cemetery travel essays.

If you could pick one word to describe your creative side, what would it be, and why?

Loren:  Curious.  I’m curious about everything, which leads me in a bunch of different directions.

What do you like on a baked potato?

Loren:  Salsa, sour cream, and green onions.

What do you think lead you to do that voodoo that you do so well?

Loren:  My mom was a librarian who didn’t censor anything I wanted to read.  She figured if I was too young to understand it, it couldn’t hurt me.  So I read through the science fiction/horror section every place she worked.

Who do you consider your biggest influence in your field?

Loren:  Ray Bradbury.

What’s the biggest potato you’ve ever eaten?

Loren:  A yam with brown sugar and coconut milk.  Yum.

If you had to pick between the three primary colors—yellow, red and blue—which do you think the world could do without?

Loren:  Yellow.

Do you prefer granny panties or thongs? Or perhaps neither?

Loren: Neither.

In fifty lying words or less, tell us why they call those little buds on potatoes ‘eyes.’ (In other words, I am not looking for the real reason. Be creative!)

Loren:  It was a change in branding. They used to be called mouths, but that put people off.  Everyone knows eyes are salty little flavor bombs.

In one word, describe the secret to success.

Loren:  Perseverance.

Why is it I can never find a parking place when I am in a rush? Every time I go somewhere just for funsies or goofing off, there are twenty places right up front. But if I am in a rush? Nope! Not a space in site!

Loren:  I just park whenever I see a parking space, no matter how far I have to walk.  Don’t get greedy.  J

How many potatoes do you think you can you lift? I am talking standard Idaho, approx 13.5 oz. What? I am NOT obsessed with potatoes! You’re like the third person this week to say that. Just answer the question.

Loren:  All the potatoes.  I can lift all the potatoes.

If you could treat any one person to dinner and a movie for all they have done for you, who would you take, where would you eat and what movie would you see?

Loren:  I’d take my daughter to Opaque, which is a restaurant in San Francisco where you eat in total darkness.  It’s an amazing experience and she deserves it for being such an inspiration.  Afterward, we’d watch the original Cat People.

What projects do you have on the burner right now?

Loren:  I sold a trilogy to Nightshade last month.  It’s a Hong Kong-style revenge story space opera with a Hammer Horror villain.  I’m waiting on the first book to come back from the editor now.

 If you had to have a few words of warning about yourself tattooed on your forehead to alert others of your dangerous nature, what would it say? (Hint: Mine would probably say, “Beware of gassy emissions.”)

Loren:  Runs with scissors.  At you.

 Say goodnight, Gracie.

Loren:  Thanks for a lovely time.

Loren Rhoads had two books out in 2013.  The first was a book of her essays called Wish You Were Here: Adventures in Cemetery Travel from Western Legends Press.  She edited The Haunted Mansion Project: Year Two for Damnation Books.  This winter saw the publication of As Above, So Below, her first novel, which was co-written with Brian Thomas, from Black Bed Sheet Books.  This spring, a memoir called This Morbid Life is coming out from Renaissance Books.  Next year, the first two books in The Dangerous Type series are coming from Nightshade Books.

You can follow Loren at:
Twitter: @MorbidLoren
Tumblr: http://www.tumblr.com/blog/morbidloren